Merry Christmas

"Christmastime is here." I love those opening words from that great song in Charlie Brown's Christmas Special. So with the arrival of Christmas, I want to wish each of you a Merry Christmas. Christmas at the Chapman's will be very different this year. We have all experienced many changes and much loss. But in the middle of it all, I continue to hear the words the angel of the Lord spoke to Mary when she received the news of Jesus' impending birth. He said, "For nothing is impossible with God." Six amazing words --- a Christmas promise. I pray that no matter what is going on in your world and no matter the trials you are facing, you will remember that life-changing Christmas promise: For nothing is impossible with God. Merry Christmas, my friends.

Christmas Fun!

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

Starring (left to right) my daughter, Claire; my sister, Suzanne; her son Jason; me; and Suzanne's son, Josh. Who knew that our family had so many amazing moves?

Huge Blessings

I had the privilege this weekend of attending the graduation of some amazing women from The Shalom Center, a Christian facility for women facing overwhelming drug, alcohol and life issues. Rhonda, a woman who got saved at Capstone a few years ago, invited me to be her guest at her graduation. It was an incredibly encouraging evening in so many ways.

The women - ranging in ages from 21 to 50-something - told stories of how their lives had spiraled out of control due to sin and bad choices. Most had faced years of alcohol and drug abuse and prostitution. Most had lost their families and everything they owned. Each had hit rock-bottom in her own way.

But in spite of years of pain and loss, each woman finally reached out for help. Their stories of God's grace and mercy were so great. Each of them talked of the redemption and forgiveness they had found in Jesus. They talked of surviving in spite of overwhelming odds. And Rhonda gave a great tribute to her daughter for standing by her through 26 years of addiction. Wow.

One of the young ladies said something that really spoke to me. She said,
"When the devil breaks you, he leaves you broken.
When God breaks you, He puts you back together."

Isn't that incredibly true? Sin destroys and leaves its victims' lives shattered. The brokenness that God brings actually works for good in our lives and results in us being more like Him.

God spoke to my heart in many ways Saturday night. He reminded me for the millionth time that He is constantly at work, even in the most difficult of situations. He reminded me that His arms of grace are long enough to reach every sinner. He reminded me of His work in Rhonda's life through Capstone Church and the incredible privilege I had to plant that church and be involved in so many people's lives. And, He reminded me that even though I am no longer involved in leading that church, the seeds of faith that He allowed me to sow into people's lives continue to grow.

I am humbled by His grace in my life. His mercies are truly new every morning. And, I am humbled that I would get to be involved in His work in the lives of people like Rhonda. What a huge blessing!

House by the Side of the Road

I attended the funeral of my cousin's father this past week in Rosman, North Carolina. At the end of the service, the pastor read a portion of the following poem. I love the words that represent the long roads of life, the challenge to be a friend to everyone and the judge of no one, and to find ourselves no better than others, no matter their lot in life.

The House by the Side of the Road

There are hermit souls that live withdrawn

In the place of their self-content;

There are souls like stars, that dwell apart,

In a fellowless firmament;

There are pioneer souls that blaze the paths

Where highways never ran -

But let me live by the side of the road

And be a friend to man.

Let me live in a house by the side of the road

Where the race of men go by -

The men who are good and the men who are bad,

As good and as bad as I.

I would not sit in the scorner's seat

Nor hurl the cynic's ban -

Let me live in a house by the side of the road

And be a friend to man.

I see from my house by the side of the road

By the side of the highway of life,

The men who press with the ardor of hope,

The men who are faint with the strife,

But I turn not away from their smiles and tears,

Both parts of an infinite plan -

Let me live in a house by the side of the road

And be a friend to man.

I know there are brook-gladdened meadows ahead,

And mountains of wearisome height;

That the road passes on through the long afternoon

And stretches away to the night.

And still I rejoice when the travelers rejoice

And weep with the strangers that moan,

Nor live in my house by the side of the road

Like a man who dwells alone.

Let me live in my house by the side of the road,

Where the race of men go by -

They are good, they are bad, they are weak, they are strong,

Wise, foolish - so am I.

Then why should I sit in the scorner's seat,

Or hurl the cynic's ban?

Let me live in my house by the side of the road

And be a friend to man.




Sam Walter Foss, written in 1899

Thankfulness

Well, the Thanksgiving holiday has passed. It came quickly and left in the same way. I have to admit that I was dreading the big day. Everything is a "first" these days since Daddy died. And, with all of the other changes that have taken place this year, it's really hard to predict how things will go.

But I have to say that Thursday was a nice day. Our family was together. Yes, there was a huge void with Daddy's absence, but we chose to focus on what we still have and not just what we have lost. I was looking around the room and thinking that each of us, in our own unique ways, has experienced all kinds of loss and changes this past year. But in spite of that, we still have so much to be incredibly thankful for. And that's what I encouraged our family to remember.

God reminded me of that truth while I was in Cuba last week. Our mission trip was great. Thanks to everyone who prayed for us. We saw many people come to know the Lord. I was refreshed by the change in scenery and focus on ministry. I'm thankful for that.

One morning, as I was battling all the negative thoughts of loss that were running through my mind, God reminded me that it was time for me to focus on what I have rather than what I do not have. That direction from Him came as a real eye-opener because I realized how consumed my thoughts were with loss. Yes, many things have changed in my life this year and there has been a lot of loss.

But I still have SO MUCH for which to be thankful. I have an amazing daughter, a loving family, a warm, safe place to live, more than enough to eat, friends who care about me, and a loving, forgiving, gracious God who calls me His child and who loves me right where I am. I could go on and on with how blessed I am. But you get the picture, right?

And so God reminded me to praise Him for what I have and to let my mind dwell on His continued blessings and faithfulness. Thinking this way requires my attention minute-by-minute. But when I do dwell on thankfulness rather than the pain of the loss, I find peace for my mind and my soul. And, my outlook on the world around me is so much better.

So, I am thankful for many things in my life. The other thing that I am doing is that when my mind begins to stray into negative territory, I sing the words of the amazing song below. Take a moment and read it and be thankful.

Blessed Be Your Name
by Matt Redman
- - -
Blessed Be Your Name
In the land that is plentiful
Where Your streams of abundance flow
Blessed be Your name

Blessed Be Your name
When I'm found in the desert place
Though I walk through the wilderness
Blessed Be Your name

Every blessing You pour out
I'll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name

Blessed be Your name
When the sun's shining down on me
When the world's 'all as it should be'
Blessed be Your name

Blessed be Your name
On the road marked with suffering
Though there's pain in the offering
Blessed be Your name

Every blessing You pour out
I'll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name

Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name

You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to say
Lord, blessed be Your name

Back to Cuba

I am headed back to Havana, Cuba on Friday, November 14. This is my fifth mission trip to the island since October, 2006. God has used the Cuban people to greatly impact my life and so I am really excited to return.

Please pray for us while we are there. I am leading a team of seven from Capstone Church. Everyone on the team has been before so that should make the trip easier.

I am anxious to see what conditions are like there. As you probably know, the island has been hit by three major hurricanes in the past couple of months. Most of them have struck south of the area where we will be working. From what I've read, the greatest impact on us will probably be food availability. The Cuban people are suffering through major food shortages. While we may only have to deal with it for one week, they are dealing with it daily. Please pray for them and that the government will work with whomever to get them the food they need.

This will be my first trip away from home since Dad passed away. No doubt a change of scenery will be good but part of me hates to leave my loved ones behind. Once you suddenly lose someone you love, the possibility of it happening again becomes very real. If you've been through it you know what I'm talking about. I trust God with it all but my human mind tells me otherwise. I choose to focus on the sufficiency of Christ.

So, please pray for us! We fly to Havana Friday morning and fly home Friday evening, Nov. 21. Pray for traveling safety and good health for the team members. And, pray that many will hear and respond to Jesus' message of love and grace that we will share.

I will post an update when I return. God bless and thanks for praying!

Restoration

It seems that a lot of the people around me are really struggling through some hard times. The recurring theme of conversations has been the issues of loss and disappointment and what is God doing and what does it all really mean and is life really supposed to be this way.

But just this week, my heart and mind have been reawakened to truth. There has been a ray of hope as I’ve prayed and read and listened for God’s voice in my life.

What God has revealed to me has been brutal. He told me that I have wallowed in all of this pain for long enough. In fact, He even showed me that I have been worshiping the pain instead of Him. I have allowed the pain to become what dominates my thoughts and anything that dominates our thoughts is what we worship.

That revelation really hurt. But once He showed it to me and I actually saw it for myself, I am now praying for and working on a shift in my focus --- away from thoughts of the loss, pain and bitterness, and back to the One who is able to heal and deliver me. This is a constant challenge and at this point I am failing more than I am succeeding. But I am praying and asking God to once again give me the mind of Christ, a mind that is focused on God and the promises that He has made to me.

One of my conversations took place on a thread on Facebook with four other people, three of whom I do not know. Everyone shared similar stories of pain and struggles and questions. Then someone posted two verses that opened up a new world of promise to me. It is Psalms 71:20-21:

“Though you have made me see troubles,
many and bitter,
you will restore my life again;
from the depths of the earth
you will again bring me up.
You will increase my honor
And comfort me once again.”

Isn’t that an amazing passage? Go back and read it again. The psalmist says that God brought the troubles into his life. That’s where this writer says they came from --- from God! We all struggle with the concept of God bringing pain into our lives. But whether you believe He allows it or causes it, we must not get stuck in the pain because the promise is not in the pain. The promise is in what comes next.

The psalmist writes that even though God brought the troubles into his life --- LOTS of painful and bitter troubles --- the psalmist knows that God WILL restore him, rescue him, increase his honor, and comfort him.

How can this guy be so confident? Because God had done it for him before! That’s why he used the word “again” three times in these two verses. This guy had experienced restoration and rescue and comfort many times before. And, since God did those things for him in the past, he is convinced that God is able to do all of them again.

God reminded me that He has done all of those things for me in the past as well AND that He will do the same for me again. That’s where my heart and my mind must be focused as I move forward. There is no limit to His love and grace and mercy for me. God is in the restoration business! He is the ultimate restorer who can take what’s broken and beaten up and make something spectacularly beautiful.

Like the psalmist, I am confident that God will restore my life again. He will bring me up again. He will increase my honor and comfort me once again because that’s how much love, grace and mercy He has for me. And, that's how much love, grace and mercy has for you.

Amen!

Get away

Some days you just have to get away.

It’s high noon and I’m sitting in a very trendy, environmentally-friendly café in downtown Asheville called “The Green Sage.” I got up this morning with a burning desire to get away. Not get away forever. Don’t worry: I’m not running for good. I just needed a change of scenery and a different thought process for a few hours today. I figured I could get done what I needed to do wherever. And my other stuff, well, it can wait a little while longer.

I guess I have the luxury of doing this today since I’m not working in an office nine-to-five. Believe me, I would rather be working a full day today. I need a job! I’m actually hoping to line some work up today. Until then, this curried chicken salad with raisins whole wheat wrap with a side of sweet potatoes fries will have to do. (And yes, it’s as good as it sounds.)

I haven’t blogged in a while. Writing can be therapeutic and with everything going on in life right now, a little therapy is what I need. So here goes.

I’ve spent the past six weeks since my dad’s passing processing sudden death and the shock of it all. We all know that you’re never prepared to lose someone you love. But when it’s sudden it seems even more difficult. Truth be told, that emotion comes from a very selfish place. Dad died exactly the way he always said that he wanted to: in his sleep. He did not suffer the horrors of chemo or struggle to breathe because of congestive heart failure. He simply told his family that he loved them and went to bed and woke up in heaven. What an incredible blessing for him.

The selfishness comes in that we did not get the long good-bye that some people get. Again, it’s a double-edged sword because with that long-goodbye usually comes suffering that is painful for everyone involved. But there is a measure of preparedness that must make all of this a little easier. I’m only speculating since I’ve never been in that place either.

The shock of someone being full of life one day and absolutely gone the next brings our mortality front and center. And it screams that all those clichés are true: “you’re not guaranteed tomorrow” and “live like you were dying.” We’ve heard each of those sayings hundreds of times. I believe it’s time to try and figure out how to live as if every day is my last.

There’s a great deal of irony in that last sentence. For me, 2008 has been a year of great loss and gut-wrenching grief. The year began tenuously yet hopeful. I was hopeful that some things that were obviously headed in the wrong direction would find the right course. And as hard as I tried to get those things on track, the difficult reality has been that I cannot fix everything and I am not supposed to be able to fix things. I also cannot understand everything. I cannot explain everything and I do not have an answer for all the questions (as much as some people want me to give them).

Here’s what I do know: God is ultimately in control. I believe that to my core. But there’s a rub in that truth. In God’s hard-to-understand ways (that most people never truly accept even though they say they do), He gives us free will, also known as the ability to make choices. And along with the freedom to make those choices comes the responsibility for the consequences. See the rub? God is in control but He gives us a measure of control called choices. What we do with our choices and whether or not we allow Him to guide our choices makes all the difference in the world.

Kind of deep, right? Most of life is really deep, complicated and complex, my friends.

I have also learned this year that there are people who really don’t want to deal with the depth and complexity of life’s great struggles. (I confess that I have been that person before.) As believers, the church often peddles an easy gospel of “trust God and everything will be okay.” That is true but the rub comes in how we live that truth out --- how we walk with people at the very moments when their worlds are falling apart. Most people are quick to dispense advice to the hurting about how to fix whatever is wrong in their lives and then their work is done. That’s the simple solution that I have seen from many people. “Tell me what’s wrong and I’ll tell you what to do.”

But that kind of superficial advice rarely takes away the pain or fixes the situation. It may be well-intentioned but it only makes the adviser feel better. To think that we can dispense advice to others about how to fix their lives yet we have never truly walked in their shoes is frighteningly presumptuous. I confess that I’ve done it many times and I’ve had it done to me. Having been on the unfortunate receiving side for a while now, I vow to try my best to never do it again.

Okay, I’m all over the board with this post, I know. There’s a lot swirling in my brain. Remember: I’m writing today for my personal therapy. And if you’re still reading at this point, I’m amazed and I thank you.

I think I’ll stop for now. My after lunch half-decaf/half-regular coffee is about cold and it’s getting time to head down the road towards home. I’m curious to know what you think about my thoughts. Comments (agreeable and disagreeable) are always welcome. I’ll write more soon.

Latest Newspaper Column

It's been a while since I've last written here. This month since Dad's passing has been an emotional time. I've thought about writing many things but never seemed to have the clarity of mind to sit down and do it. I hope to begin regularly writing again very soon.

Here is a link to my latest column in the Anderson Independent-Mail that was published today. Check it out if you have a moment. God's best to each of you.

A grateful, heavy heart

My father passed away Thursday morning.

Writing those words cuts at my very core. It is unimaginable. I knew it would happen some day. Just not that day. Not in the middle of everything else. Not when there is so much to do, so much to talk about, so much to figure out. And already so much hurt.

Daddy was the rock. He and Mama had become my refuge over these months, just as they had been when I was a kid. I could always run to them when I was hurt or tired or just needed someone to say that everything will be okay.

And Daddy and I were finally figuring each other out.

It wasn't too late. The understanding came at just the right time. The humbleness. The open hearts. The acceptance. The forgiveness. God gave those gifts to me over these last few years so that I could bury my father yesterday with no regrets.

No regrets. Thank you, Daddy. Thank You, God.

Pray for Cuba

Please pray for the people of Cuba as another hurricane pounds their island today. Ike seems to be even more devastating than Gustav was a couple of weeks ago. Reports of 50 foot waves are coming out of Baracoa, a coastal area mid-island.

Pastor Eduardo and the church leaders we work with there have ministries in Baracoa. Eduardo and his ministry is based in an area called Alamar which is on the coast near Havana. Obviously, being in a coastal area that's practically at sea level will be devastating with a storm like this.

Join me in praying for physical safety for the people and their property. They have so little to begin with that it's hard to imagine how they will rebuild. But God knows and I am confident He is more than able to provide for them.

We are scheduled to return to the island in two months, November 14 - 21. We'll see this week if the storm affects the work God has for us to do there.

Thanks for praying.

What's been going on?

I've gotten that question a lot over the last few weeks. I appreciate the genuine concern from those who have asked. So, in an effort to answer the question, I'll give you a totally random list. Read on at your own risk.

• I've had a lot of heart pain. Not the physical kind (thank the Lord). It's been the emotional kind. Today is one month since I resigned as Pastor of Capstone. I knew it would be hard but I had no idea that my guts and heart would actually ache over the loss. Like my friend Cliff said, since God birthed this church through me, it's like giving up your child who isn't yet grown. That really is a great description. I don't say that to mean that the church was mine in the first place - it's always been the Lord's - but when God planted it in your heart and you've been there from day one, you feel an incredible sense of responsibility for its well-being. Yes, God is continuing to teach me to let go of many things in my life. Sometimes I realize that I'm a slow learner.
• I'm looking for a job --- something I haven't done in 20 years. In some ways I feel good about what I've accomplished during this month. I've been able to reconnect with some great friends that I had during my business career and they have been more than willing to help me out. That's been really great. And, many of you are looking around for me as well. I appreciate you!
• On the flip side, I haven't found a job during this first month and so things aren't that good yet! Ahhh, the waiting game. God is teaching me through it. Again, I'm a slow learner.
• My aunt died last week. Bobbie Davenport was only 54-years-old and was a valiant cancer warrior for 12 years. I was honored to do her graveside service on Saturday. She and her family have lived in Texas for the past 20 years and so our time together has been somewhat limited. My uncle Ronny and cousins Brett, Amanda and Tami were here this past weekend. I really enjoyed the time spent with them at my grandmother's house and at mom and dad's. The whole family was together for the first time in many years - that was great. And even though we were mourning Bobbie's passing, we laughed a lot and enjoyed being together. I cherish family more and more as the weeks pass.
• My daughter Claire led one of the worship songs at church on Sunday. It was AMAZING! Claire has loved music from day one and sings constantly. We never pushed her to sing publicly - especially since Yvonne and I both did for many years. So on her own, she got involved in the band and led us Sunday. It was GREAT. I cried many tears watching her praise the Lord. I continue to be in awe at what God did when He created her. She is such an incredible blessing and I'm proud to be her dad.
• I'm getting tired of the Olympics.
• I know a lot of people battling cancer right now. Pray for my friend Mike's dad, Larry Marcie. He was just diagnosed last week and it doesn't look good.
• I am ready to go to work. I'm not one to sit around. And even though I've kept fairly busy, I need some long term projects (that pay) in which to be involved.
• Thanks to those of you who've called to check on me and those who've taken me to lunch. Jim, I enjoyed today, my friend.
• The enemy has been all over my family for a long time now. Not just at my house but the extended family as well. There are many battles going on but the war is already won! Gloria a Dios!
• I have ants all over the kitchen. Everyone says they're looking for water. So, if I put a bowl of water outside, will that take care of them????? Can I send them over to your house?
• We're putting together our next Cuba Mission Team. I will be leading the trip November 14-21. I'm excited to be able to do this. If any of you Capstoners are interested in going, we have room for a few more. Also, I'll be funding my trip myself this time. So, if any of you want to be a part of that, send me an email and I'll tell you how to get involved.

Finally, thanks for all the prayers you've sent my way over the recent days. They are much needed and much appreciated.

Going Home

I know it's been a while since I've written. Sorry about that. I've kind of been at a loss as to what to write. With everything that's been going on over the last few months, and especially the big change of no longer pastoring Capstone, it's hard to put into words all of my emotions and thoughts. Some days I think I'm doing okay. Others, not so much. God continues to remind me of His faithfulness, plans and purposes. I am still looking for a job. My Capstone family has been amazing during these days. I want you to know that I really do appreciate your prayers and kind words.

As many of you know, I grew up here in Anderson and was really involved at Concord Baptist Church. Concord was a huge blessing to me. I was a part of everything and loved every minute of it. I met Jesus at Concord. God called me to pastor as a teenager at Concord. I even worked on staff at Concord eight years ago.

Last night, I went back to Concord for the first time in a long time. My 86-year-old grandmother (Rachel Davenport) is still a member there. And so Claire, my sister Suzanne, Grandmother and I went to hear Dr. Don Wilton preach. Dr. Wilton is the pastor of First Baptist, Spartanburg.

For me, going back to Concord last night was just like going home --- and it felt so good. I got more hugs at one church service than I have gotten in a long time! And what made the hugs so special was that they came from people who go way back in my life --- over 30 years for many of them. These are people who laid a foundation of truth in my life that I have had the privilege of passing on as a pastor for these years.

As the service began, I sat on the wooden pew and listened to the organ play and the choir sing. And I was overwhelmed by the goodness of God. I scanned the faces of the choir and saw camp chaperones and youth counselors and Vacation Bible School teachers. I saw the faces of teenage friends and prayer warriors who have encouraged and loved me through the years. I saw the faces of people who are still honoring God with their lives. They're not perfect --- they have struggled through some hard times like all of us --- but they are still faithfully serving the Lord after all these years.

God knew I needed some old friends to put their arms around me and tell me that they love me. Most seemed to know about what's been going on in my life lately. They were all very sorry and assured me of their prayers. But most importantly, through different things that were said, they wanted me to know that they were home for me and that I was always welcome there.

That felt really good.

Sometimes, you just need to go home. I thank the Lord that when I was just a child He gave me a home church filled with amazing people who have meant so much in my life. And I thank Him and them for blessing me as they did last night.

"Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers." Galatians 6:9-10 (NIV)

His Loving Presence in the Process

An old friend emailed me this week after hearing about all that is going on in my life. It was good to hear from him. He and I were really close growing up. Our families vacationed together. We spent the night at each other's houses, went to church together, and had some of the typical teenager adventures. Amazingly, we are both now ministers and even had daughters born on the same day! I count him as my best friend during those growing up years.

Adulthood brought marriage and kids and changes and distance for both of us. But even after all of this time, there is something comforting in that connection that goes all the way back to those earliest years.

My friend wrote something in his email that has stayed with me for these past few days: "I am praying that as you walk through all this, the Lord will give you rest for your soul and His loving presence in the process. "

As I've thought about what he wrote, I have come to the conclusion that the trials of life are really about processes. I am walking through a process right now. You probably are as well. And no matter what the issue is --- financial, health, relational, spiritual, jobs, raising kids, marital, stress, anxiety, fear --- dealing with it is a process. In the real world, there are very few quick fixes and miraculous resolutions. I am not saying God is not in the miracle business. He definitely is. But my experience has been that His miracles are always a part of His processes.

The word "process" is defined as "a systematic series of actions directed to some end." Right now, I am asking God to show me the "systematic series of actions" I am to take in order to get to the end. I have no idea what the "end" will look like and I am okay with that because I am confident that He does.

I simply want His loving presence in the process. Moses gave Joshua the promise of God's presence and you and I can claim this promise for ourselves: "The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged." Deuteronomy 31:8 (NIV)

Don't miss what that verse says: It is the Lord himself who goes before us and will be with us. It is the Lord himself who will never leave us nor forsake us. We get the Lord himself! Not some substitute who may or may not be trustworthy. Not a human like ourselves who will let us down. But the Lord himself.

As long as we cling to Him, His loving presence will always be in the processes of our lives.

Amen and Gloria a Dios!

Thanks

Thanks to everyone who has left comments, emailed or called this week. Your expressions of love and support during this trial have been amazing. I have felt the strength of your prayers. Please keep them going.

It's been a difficult week. The reality of all these changes have begun to settle in. I need some "normal" and have no idea what that is right now. I also need a job. If you have any contacts with non-profit groups or for-profit businesses (my pre-ministry background is in public relations, marketing, journalism and communications), send me some info and I'll be glad to send my resume. I'm trusting God for the job and for the next steps for me.

Claire and the World Changers mission team get back today. They've had a great week in Roanoke, Virginia. I actually drove up to see them on Wednesday. They had the afternoon and evening off and I had a need to get in the car and go somewhere so it was a great time. They were really surprised to see me. I've been to World Changers every year with them and it's killed me this week to not be there. We have the greatest youth group around and most of them are like my own kids.

Here's some encouragement from my Bible time this morning: "Therefore, we who have fled to him for refuge can have great confidence as we hold to the hope that lies before us. This hope is a strong and trustworthy anchor for our souls." Hebrews 6:18-19 (New Living Translation).

A "strong and trustworthy anchor for our souls." What a great promise.

News

This is a condensed version of what I shared with the church this past Sunday.

"I want to begin with thanks for your prayers and support over these months of trials. I have shared with you about the very difficult trials that my family and I have been walking through for many months now. One of the challenges every pastor faces is the ability to be transparent and open and honest about his life and at the same time maintain some privacy and personal space to work through those trials. Pastors are just people. God has called us to a very special ministry that includes great responsibility. But at the end of the day, I am just a guy walking the same road that you are. That road also includes trials and heartache and difficulties and disappointment. No one is exempt from the enemy’s attacks and his schemes. In fact, pastors and their families are probably more vulnerable because of the role we play in God’s work.

I struggle even today to know what and how much to share with you. The stress my family and I have been facing began a number of years ago with the normal struggles of life and marriage. Add to that the serious depression and emotional issues that my wife has been battling for a number of years and we find ourselves in a very difficult place. We have spent most of the past three months apart and have been unable to resolve any of the issues that have brought us to this place. We have sought counseling together and separately and will continue to do that. But just as these issues did not appear overnight, they cannot be resolved over night.

Obviously, the state of my marriage and my personal life has a huge impact on my ability to lead and pastor the church. Ministry is not like other “jobs” where you can just block out the personal stuff and put your shoulder to the plow and get your job done. I’ve tried to do it and it’s just not possible. In ministry it is all the same and all connected.

I take my call of spiritual leadership very seriously. This has never been just a job for me. I have tried to never be the pastor who put on fronts or tried to make you think I’m something that I am not. I have always wanted to be open and honest about my imperfections and faults and my own journey to honor God with my life. I have tried to protect my wife through these trials. I have taken every step I know to take to be a man of God, to faithfully honor my wife and our marriage, and to make things right between us.

That’s as honest as I know to be and that’s how I stand before you today. My heart is broken over the circumstances of our lives and the pain we are in. I have tried to fix things and do things that I thought were right. But I have not been able to fix anything. Finally, God told me to let it go and just wait on Him and that He will be faithful to take care of us because we belong to Him and He loves us.

The leadership of our church has been supportive throughout this process. They have left decisions about how I need to handle things up to me. It’s been frustrating for them and for some of you because you haven’t known what to do to help fix things --- you love us and want things to be okay --- and it looks like from the outside there should be an easy solution. But there is not an easy solution.

And so, after much prayer and seeking the Lord’s will and wise counsel with godly people I trust, I am stepping down as pastor of Capstone Church. This has been a really hard decision because my flesh says to tough it out and make it work somehow. But God says to let it go, to lay it down on the altar, and let Him take it from there. I know that it is what I must do for the good of the church and the good of me and my family.

The road ahead for Yvonne and me is a very long road and that contributed greatly to my decision. While I know that you all support us and want to see our relationship healed and me remain as the Pastor here, I believe it would be unfair and unhealthy for the church to be distracted by this process and to continue in a place of limbo while we work through these personal issues. We cannot let anything distract us from the mission God has given.

I want you to know that there are no sin issues in my life that require me to resign today. I am far from perfect but I have not done anything that disqualifies me from ministry. No one has asked me to resign. As difficult as this is, I know this is a step of obedience that God requires me to take.

The journey of Capstone Church has been amazing and one that I will cherish for the rest of my life. I cannot even begin to tell you what a privilege it has been to be your pastor and to be a part of your lives. And Lord willing, I hope to be able to continue to be a part of Capstone’s journey as a church member and servant along side with you. There is still so much work to be done here. God has brought together an incredible group of people here I am confident that He will bring the next visionary pastor to continue the good work that He has started in us.

I don’t know what is next for me. But I do know the One who already has that figured out. He is my faithful, loving, good, and kind Heavenly Father. The same God who made a way for the Israelites into the Promised land, who fed 5,000 from the fish and loaves, who healed the blind, mute and crippled, the same God who always makes a way when there seems to be no way, will make a way for me and my family.

So take heart, church. Please do not lose your focus on the amazing God we serve and the vision that lies before us. Remember: you are the church. The church is not about me as the Pastor. It is about each of us and the relationships we are building and the opportunities God has given us to “love people into the abundant life that comes through a relationship with Jesus Christ.” That’s Capstone – that’s who we are – and that will never change."

There were many tears shed by many of us on Sunday. But amazingly, God showed up and His presence was obvious as we worshiped Him. My goal for Sunday was to bring glory to Him. I pray that happened because He alone deserves it for all the great things He has done.

Sunday at Capstone

After being away from the pulpit and office for the past month, I'll be preaching at Capstone this Sunday. I have really missed teaching each week and getting to share with all of you. Through this time of seeking Him, God has provided some direction. I hope you'll be there this Sunday if at all possible.

Thanks for the prayers until then.

Learning

One of the things I have been doing during my time off from the church is some self-study and personal reflection on God, my relationship with Him, and my life. God has been really faithful to teach me and show me things through His Word and through a couple of books that I have been reading.

God has repeatedly told me to wait on Him. I, like so many others, want solutions now. I have spent many days anxious and stressed-out and wondering why God is not resolving the struggles in my marriage now. Through my anxiety, God has taught me:

• To rest in His peace during the storm. This is a choice I must constantly make. I am concentrating on His peace in my mind and in my conversations with Him, myself (yes, I talk to myself), and others. And, when I feel that anxiety building - whether self-induced or from others - I claim the peace He has given me that transcends all understanding. My lack of peace usually means I have moved back into the "fix it" mode instead of God fixing it. Peace is resting in Him.
  
• God has a plan. What I see unfolding around me is not the plan I could have ever anticipated. Most of it makes no sense to me. But isn't that usually how God works? What we think is right or best is not the way He sees it because He sees everything from His eternal perspective. I look at this suffering and can't make sense of it. But, God's Word tells me that He uses suffering to make His children more like Him. I can accept that. I do not understand it all. But I can accept it and choose to rejoice in it. "And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast." 1 Peter 5:10
• It is okay to let go of my circumstances. Like a child who is first learning to walk, it is okay for me to let go of what I think I can and should do and walk by faith. God has been teaching me to trust Him more and myself less. My mind tells me that I have to figure everything out and come up with the solution or there will not be one. In fact, I often think that if I don't figure it all out, I am failing in some way. God never said to figure it all out in our power. He said to trust Him and to follow Him in obedience and righteousness. The answer is already there. He already has it figured out. It's cliche but true: I must "let go and let God." I will wait on Him to reveal His answers.
  

"Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal." 2 Corinthians 4:16-18

Here's a resource I recommend for you if you too are facing some difficult circumstances in your life. It's called "Advancing through Adversity" by Charles Stanley. It's a self-study book that has been incredibly helpful to me over the past few weeks as I have sought understanding of God's purposes and plans during this trial. It's really good.

Thanks for continuing to stop by and for your prayers. God bless.

Freedom Cherished

Happy Independence Day! As Americans, we are blessed to live in a free country. So enjoy your freedom today as you cherish what God has given to us.

"We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness."
- The Declaration of Independence, July 4, 1776

Conversations

I had three very interesting conversations today.

The first was with God. Yes, I talked to God today and He talked to me. I wish I could tell you that He gave me all the answers to all the questions that I've been asking for many months now. That didn't happen. But it was still a great conversation.

I spent some time this morning telling God about all the things I am thankful for. In the middle of the hard times I have been walking through, I have found that it's been really easy to only see what's wrong. That's where we all seem to get focused - on what's NOT right rather than on what IS right. But there is a long list of blessings in my life that God reminded me of this morning. As I thanked Him for each one, He reassured me in my spirit that it is His pleasure to bless me. And in His Word He told me, "...for God's gifts and his call are irrevocable." (Romans 11:29) I serve a God who desires to bless me and He has blessed me indeed AND He will continue to bless me as I follow Him.

My second conversation was with a friend at lunch. This friend is someone that I have not spent any one-on-one time with in a couple of years. As I shared with him the struggles going on in my marriage, God greatly used him to encourage me. He said that one of the things God has been teaching him is that God does not work in linear ways like we think He does or should. We think that if we do A + B we will get C. But God does not work in that way because His view of the world and all the things going on in it and in us is much greater than some simple formula. We think that if we live the Christian life and faithfully follow Christ and do what we should do then we can EXPECT God to do things for us in return and that we will not have the struggles that others do because we uphold our end of the deal.

But, as my friend said, following God does not involve some formula that, if followed, will result in only good things for us. Jesus promised suffering for His followers and He never promised that it would all make sense to us.

During this trial I've had some well-meaning friends advise me to take steps A + B and I will get C and everything will be okay. (I admit I have offered the same advise in the past.) Guess what? I've done A and B and so far, no C. Obviously, God has something else planned and it's okay for me to rest in His peace and wait on Him.

My third conversation was with an author of a book I started reading this afternoon. Amazingly, He said the same thing to me in his book that my friend said at lunch. There is not some "God formula" that we can discover and apply it to our problems and suddenly make sense of them all. God is working in ways that are SO MUCH GREATER than anything we can even begin to imagine. Even when we do not see Him front and center on the stage of our lives, He is expertly working behind the scenes to bring everything together according to His plans for us. His plans may not look like ours. The outcome may not be what we could have predicted or what makes sense to us or others. In fact, the outcome may be confusing to us. But even so, God is working it out according to what He (and He alone) can achieve. That's how amazing He is and how much He loves us.

So, I am blessed today and I praise God for it. Sorry I cannot give you a simple plan or some linear formula that's going to solve your and my problems and suddenly make them go away. Wait --- yes, I can: "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths. " Proverbs 3:5-6 (NKJV)

Church Hopping

One of the benefits for a pastor who's taking a few weeks off is that he can visit some other churches and worship with them. I did that yesterday and really enjoyed seeing how God is at work in other places --- even though I really missed being at Capstone!

The funniest part of the experience was walking into the two churches and seeing the facial reaction from the pastors. Both saw me as soon as I walked in and the look on their faces said, "What is he doing here?" Pastors RARELY visit other churches because of the whole working-on-Sunday-morning thing. Their shock was priceless. One even asked if I had gotten myself fired!

My first stop was Hope Fellowship. Mark Gasque is pastor and Jeff Brannon is worship pastor. Mark and I are connected because we bought his house when we moved to Anderson eight years ago. I know Jeff better. We have mutual friends and have hung out at lunch. Both are great guys.

Hope meets at 9:30 am in a former retail space between Books-A-Million and Circuit City. They've done a great job converting an old store into "church space." Everything looks top notch. The sound was great. Jeff is an excellent vocalist and leader and the band was tight. A young man on guitar shared vocals with Jeff and he had an excellent voice as well. They had a guest preacher. I slipped out before the service was over so I could get to my next destination.

The crowd was small but friendly. I was reminded of something us churches do that I had forgotten about. Those times when we "turn and welcome someone to the church" can be really uncomfortable for visitors if it lasts too long. I found myself standing alone with only a few people reaching out to me. Everyone else spent time greeting those they knew. This is understandable (it happens at Capstone) but awkward for the guest who really wants to just be a part of the service and not become too obvious. A good reminder.

My second stop was at Redeemer Church whose service begins at 10:30 am. Redeemer is a new Presbyterian church that meets in the old Ramada Inn. Patrick Miller is the pastor. Patrick and I met at Panera a few years ago and have talked a few times since then. I like what I've seen of Patrick and felt the Lord leading me to worship there.

The service Patrick and his team put together was for me (and others, I'm sure). Their service included a lot of Scripture, a time of personal confession and repentance, reflection, and prayer. Patrick did a great job teaching the Word. And the service concluded with Communion.

What touched me the most was how the service began. Patrick read (as it was projected on the walls) some Scripture about repentance and confession. Then, he invited us (if we were willing and physically able) to kneel before the Lord in humility and reverence as we allowed God to search our hearts. This simple act of personal reflection and honoring God by kneeling and praying helped me to prepare my heart for worship. Just a few moments of confessing all my struggles and anxieties and asking God to speak to me during the service had a HUGE impact on my personal worship. I felt more open and in tune with God and ready to hear from Him. And God really spoke to me through the songs, the Scripture and the sermon.

From the moment the service began, there was a sense of honor and reverence towards our amazing God. The set-up was simple. (Reminded me of Capstone's beginning days at the LaQuinta Inn.) The songs were a mix of current and traditional. There were kids in the room squirming and people going in and out. But throughout everything that was said and sung, God was exalted. It was all about Him. We even sang, "How Great Is Our God" along with "A Mighty Fortress." What a great combo!

I left there feeling personally stronger and more ready to handle the challenges of my life because our focus had been on the greatness of God. Understand: I knew God was great going in. But spending 90 minutes truly focused there had a great impact on me. And it all began with that time of confession and reflection.

That's something I don't do enough personally and it's something we do not do enough corporately as well. I'm looking forward to adding that in our Capstone services in the future.

One of my goals during this time off from Capstone is my personal spiritual nourishment. I got fed yesterday at two different churches and I thank God for them both. It's great to see God at work through new churches in our community.

Thanks for continuing to pray for me and my family. Those prayers continue to be greatly needed.

"The Shack" Review

A couple of weeks ago, I got emails on the same day from two different people in the church telling me that I had to read this book called "The Shack." Knowing I was going to be taking some time off, I picked it up and gave it a read.

A little background: The Shack has been one of those books that "came out of nowhere" and has steadily climbed the bestseller charts. Even though it was published over a year ago, as of today, it is the #10 bestselling book of all books on Amazon.com. It has created a lot of buzz from people who love its message of redemption to many in Christian circles bashing it for its obvious theological errors and twisting of fundamental Scriptural principles.

I mostly enjoyed reading "The Shack." The reader - especially the reader who is a Christ-follower - must understand that it is a work of fiction. Many of the descriptions of God, the Trinity, and His sovereignty are not accurate. Yet there is much that is Truth within this little book. That's what makes a book like this potentially dangerous to the reader who does not know what he or she actually believes as truth.

The appeal of "The Shack" is obvious. It taps into the emotional reservoirs that are common for us all: the guilt of past mistakes, personal failures, trying to understand why tragedies occur, and ultimately, making sense of God. As I was reading, I could easily relate to the emotional state of the main character (Mack) and to the questions about life that he had. Everyone shares the common experience of heartbreak at some point in life. And, everyone is looking for healing and hope.

The Shack attempts to provide that healing and hope through its fictional characters. While the story is genuinely relatable and its redemptive ending feels good to the reader, its inaccuracies in Truth should be a caution to anyone who reads it. Don't go looking to "The Shack" to give you hope in your circumstances. Don't go looking to "The Shack" to provide emotional healing for some hurt you may have. Don't go looking to "The Shack" for a better understanding of God.

Look to God's Word found in The Bible for hope, healing, and understanding. That is the only place to find absolute Truth in our world.

Should you read The Shack? You may enjoy it. You may want to stay away from it. I trust you can make that decision for yourself.

Just remember that ultimate Truth, life-changing Truth, is not found in an old wooden barn in the middle of the woods. It's found only in the Holy Word of God.

PS - Have you read this book? Leave a comment and share what you thought about it.

Time

If you were at Capstone yesterday, you heard me share that I am going to be taking the next month off from the daily work of pastoral ministry. In some ways, it was a difficult decision to make. I love what God has given me to do and I take my calling and responsibility to the church very seriously. My heart's desire is to be faithful to my role as pastor and teacher. But in other ways, the decision for the time away came very easily.

I've shared with you that over the past six months or so, my family has been going through some extreme trials. These trials have taken their toll on us. I am physically tired and emotionally exhausted. I know that this is not a good place for anyone to be, especially someone charged with the spiritual leadership of God's flock. The Lord has made it clear to me that I need some time to take care of myself, my family, and to focus on our health. My responsibilities to them is even more important than my responsibilities to the church.

I know that the Lord is our answer and our solution. He has been that for me since the day I met Him as Savior 34 years ago. HOW He is going to reveal His answers and solutions at this time has yet to be seen. I am going to spend this time seeking Him and waiting on Him.

I serve at Capstone with some amazing people. Our leadership team of trustees and staff have been and continue to be completely supportive of me, my family, and the needs we have. They are giving me this time with their blessings and prayers and for that I am so appreciative.

If you are a part of the Capstone family, let me remind you again of what I shared yesterday. During this time, we must not become like "most churches." At "most churches," when the pastor is away, people use that as an excuse not to go to church. Don't do that. At "most churches," when there are trials within the body, especially if it involves leadership, people begin to gossip and pass judgment and make up stories without knowing the truth. Don't do that.

Capstone has never been like "most churches" and we must not become that now. The work of God's church continues. The mission that God has given us of "Loving people into the abundant life that comes through a relationship with Jesus Christ" has not changed. If anything, the trials and challenges we all face should draw us closer together as a body as we pray and love and hold each other up during the hard times. The enemy wants to use whatever he can find to divide us. But as God's family, we must pray fervently and continue the fight against the enemy every step of the way.

Thank you for continuing to pray for us. I thank you for your love and support for me and my family. I will not be disappearing or going into hiding during this month. You'll see us at most everything going on. On Sundays, we will have different speakers in the pulpit and I look forward to hearing from them as well. And finally, I do not know how often I will write here over these weeks. I will as the Lord gives me something to share with you.

Blessings.

Home

It was great to have a few days and nights away at the beach. There's a place in Garden City that we've been going to off and on for many years. It's really like a second home. Very comfortable. Oceanfront. Most importantly, it's away from the madness of Myrtle Beach. No one had reserved the place the first week of June - which is very unusual. So we jumped on it. The Lord provided the time and I'm thankful.

Claire took a friend with her and so she had someone to hang with. That was good. I spent the early mornings walking the beach and talking (out loud) to God --- filling His ear with all my questions and asking Him for answers. I've always felt His enormity at the beach. Just looking out at the vastness of the ocean and the power of the waves confirms to me that He is huge and powerful. Even the fact that the ocean knows where to stop as the tides come and go completely amazes me.

Did God give me my answers? Honestly? Not as specifically as I would like. But He did remind me who He is and who I am because of Him. He reminded me of His plans and purposes for me -- plans to prosper me and not to harm me, plans to give me a hope and a future. He reminded me that I walk by faith and not by sight and that it's okay for me not to have the answers. He reminded me that He knew about this trial and He knows where this road leads. He reminded me to trust Him completely and to listen for and to His voice alone. That's what I must do as I continue to walk this road.

We had some serious fun at the Nascar Speedpark, though a five-year-old driving a go-cart (is that crazy or what???) about gave me whiplash as he hit me full speed after the race was over. Not good. We played putt-putt a couple of times and hit the arcade a few times as well. No matter how high-tech some of the games get, there's nothing better than skee ball with those old wooden balls. I love it!

I hear David did a great job at Capstone on Sunday. I will be back at Capstone this Sunday but I'm not speaking. Our youth leader, Brent Thomason, will be bringing the message. I am really looking forward to what God gives him to share. Brent did a great job speaking in Cuba on our last mission trip. I know God will use him on Sunday. Pray for him this week as he prepares!

And please pray for me as I take a few more days off. I continue to pray and seek God's wisdom and direction. Pray for Yvonne and Claire as well. And thanks for your love and concern for each of us!

Off

I'm off for a few days of sand and surf. We're headed down to Garden City so I won't be in blog-land for a while.

I would really appreciate you praying for me while I'm away. God knows I need a mental break and some answers. I'm thankful that He has a plentiful supply of both.

Thanks for praying for me and my family. I pray God blesses your week as well.

Latest newspaper column

As a member of our local newspaper's Faith and Values Advisory Board, I write a column every six to seven weeks. The latest ran today and you can read it here. Parts of it were a blog a month or so ago, so it may look familiar to you. Let me know what you think.

The Good Shepherd

I am reading through the Psalms in my quiet time. When I got to Psalm 23, I felt as if I already knew it and wondered how many times I had heard or read it over the years.

But the wording in the New Living Translation is very fresh and really spoke to me. Please take a moment and read it slowly, letting each promise resonate in your spirit. And be blessed and reassured through whatever is going on in your life today. Your shepherd knows.

"The Lord is my shepherd; I have all that I need.
He lets me rest in green meadows; he leads me beside peaceful streams.
He renews my strength. He guides me along right paths, bringing honor to his name.
Even when I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me.
Your rod and your staff protect and comfort me.
You prepare a feast for me in the presence of my enemies.
You honor me by anointing my head with oil.
My cup overflows with blessings.
Surely your goodness and unfailing love will pursue me all the days of my life, and I will live in the house of the Lord forever."
Psalm 23 (NLT)

Family Day at the Braves

We spent Memorial Day in Atlanta watching the Braves beat the Arizona Diamond-
backs. My sister and I gave Mom and Dad this trip for Mother's Day and his birthday. They are HUGE Braves fans and we thought they would really enjoy the day. And they did! Claire and Josh (one of my sister's two sons) were in the middle of all the fun as well.

It was such a great day for family memories. We laughed all day long. Everyone had a story about some crazy trip we took when we were kids. We had lunch at The Dwarf House, which is the original Chick-Fil-A. The Lord blessed us with great seats right behind first base in the SHADE! Since it was Memorial Day, there was a moving tribute to veterans and our nation, including a fighter jets fly-over. And Phil Stacey, American Idol alum, sang the national anthem. AND, the Braves won!

Claire got all excited watching Yunel Escobar play shortstop. Escobar is a 25-year-old Cuban and a rising star on the Braves' team. She's into all things Cuban (as you can see from her shirt above) and was trying to figure out how to meet him. She took more pictures of him than she did anything else during the day!

God is so good. Through all the ups and down of life, I count it a blessing to have a loving and supportive family. Even though we were missing a couple of members yesterday, I was reminded once again how blessed we are. Mom and Dad have given so much to us over the years --- it was a real blessing to give back to them in a small way and make some memories that will last forever.

Pray for this Family

As you may have heard already, Steven Curtis Chapman's five-year-old daughter died yesterday when she was accidentally struck by a vehicle driven by her older brother. This is an incredible tragedy that makes every parent's heart ache. Not only have they lost a child but it came about accidentally through one of their other children. They will experience unspeakable grief over the days ahead.

Here's a note written from Chapman's manager on his website:

Your prayers are needed for all in the Chapman family. This is a family who has so generously loved and given to so many. Just hours before this close knit family was celebrating the engagement of the oldest daughter Emily Chapman, and were just hours away from a graduation party marking Caleb Chapman's completion of high school. Now, they are preparing to bury a child who blew out 5 candles on a birthday cake less than 10 days ago. These words are unthinkable to type. - Jim Houser (Manager)

The music of Steven Curtis Chapman has had a big impact on my life over the past 20 years. He seems to be a grounded man of strong faith and character. I have been greatly encouraged by his music over the years. I even used to sing one of his songs when Yvonne and I travelled in ministry. It is called, "My Redeemer Is Faithful and True." I pray the words to that song will now encourage this family.

In spite of his fame and celebrity, at the end of the day he's simply a man whose heart is broken. Please pray for him, his wife and all the family.

As we all know, life can change forever in an instant. But God is our hope no matter the circumstances of life.

"May your unfailing love rest upon us, O LORD, even as we put our hope in you." Psalm 33:22 (NIV)

Completely Covered

"But let all who take refuge in you rejoice;
let them sing joyful praises forever.
Spread your protection over them,
that all who love your name may be filled with joy.
For you bless the godly, O Lord;
you surround them with your shield of love."
Psalm 5:11-12 (New Living Translation)

One of the characteristics of God that I am always thankful for is that He is our Protector. I spent some time reading in the first few chapters of Psalms this morning and ran across this beautiful character-trait once again.

David, the shepherd boy who became king of Israel, paints a picture of God as Protector in the above passage. I know that David knew what it meant to take refuge in God. David faced all kinds of trials in his life --- some brought on by those who did not like or approve of him. Others were brought on by himself and the bad decisions he made.

But through it all, David continually ran back to God because his experience showed him that God was his Protector. Look at the request David made for all of us who take refuge in God: "Spread your protection over them." Those words bring to my mind a large, sturdy canopy spread over God's people. We gather under it and are protected from the storms that rage around us. It's like God's giant umbrella and we can get under it and be safe there with Him.

The other phrase I love in this passage is the end of verse 12: ". . . you surround them with your shield of love." Not only are we protected from above, but we are protected on all sides by God's shield of love. God's shield of love is strong and cannot be penetrated by the enemy. No matter what may come at us, God's shield of love will stand.

That means God has us completely covered! That's good news for the beginning of this new week, isn't it? I have no idea what may happen in my life this week. I am sure you do not either. But no matter what may come our way, when we make Him our refuge, we can rejoice because He spreads His protection over us and surrounds us with His shield of love --- and we are safe there.

Thank You, God!

Word of the Day

fog (fôg, fŏg)
noun
1.	droplets of water vapor suspended in the air near the ground
2.	an atmosphere in which visibility is reduced because of a cloud of some substance
3.	confusion characterized by lack of clarity

For some reason, #2 & 3 apply to me today. #1 may also, depending on what the weather does.

Monday Thoughts

Good Monday to you, my faithful readers. I hope you all had a great weekend and that your week is off to a good start. Here's a rundown of what's running through my head, just in case you are interested:

• I am really thankful for my mother. She has given and sacrificed so much for me, my sister, my dad, the grandkids, and all of her family for many years. I would not be the man I am today if it had not been for her. She also taught me to cook and bake and for that I am very thankful as well. Yes, I am a mama's boy and have no problem with that. I love you, Mama!
• I have thoroughly enjoyed the "Spring Training" teaching series we've been in at Capstone. The response has been great and it has really focused me and many others on how we can condition ourselves to follow Christ. This week, we're working on keeping our feet on the path that God has for us --- not the evil ones all around us!
• My dad's birthday is this Thursday, May 15, so my sister and I decided to give Mom and Dad a joint mother's day/birthday present. We are taking them to see the Atlanta Braves play on Memorial Day. They LOVE the Braves and watch all the games on TV. It should be a lot of fun for all of us to pile in the van and head to Atlanta for the game.
• Claire reminded me last night that she's about finished with tenth grade in only one year she will be headed into her senior year and then off to college. I asked her not to tell me that again for at least another year.
• Could you believe the wind yesterday and last night? It was crazy!
• An old friend from high school has been at church the last few Sundays. That has been cool. My sister saw me talking to her yesterday after the service and my sister said, "She doesn't look as old as you do." Thanks, Sis! Love you too!!!
  
• I am looking forward to our lake service on Memorial weekend, May 25. (Don't forget we will NOT be meeting at AmStar.) It's always fun to do something different and worship outside. Maybe Bekky will lead us in "God of Wonders." That would be great for an outdoor service, wouldn't it? I wonder if she's ever thought of doing "God of Wonders???"
  
• Much prayer continues to be needed on the home front. Please continue to pray for all three of us.
  

Thanks for stopping by today!

Truth

"Kings take pleasure in honest lips; they value a man who speaks the truth." Proverbs 16:13 (NIV)

One of the things I have learned about life over these many years is that an honest answer is always the best answer.

I can usually tell when someone is lying, not telling the whole truth, or omitting parts of the story that if told could result in some kind of problem for that person. For whatever reason, I have always been able to do this. My daughter hates this about me because it means that she seldom gets away with anything. She has asked me many times, "Daddy, how did you know?" And I say, "I just did!"

What amazes me about honesty and truth in today's world is that most people never tell "the whole truth and nothing but the truth" and everyone seems to be okay with that. People are constantly stretching the truth --- even some who call themselves Christ-followers. Know what happens to truth that is stretched? It's just like a rubber band pulled to its ultimate breaking point. One more stretch and it will pop and the sting of that elastic snap will leave a painful whelp. And once the rubber band actually breaks, it's nearly impossible to put it back together.

God talks a lot about truth, honesty, and integrity in His Word. Look at this: "The integrity of the upright guides them, but the unfaithful are destroyed by their duplicity." Proverbs 11:3 (NIV). Integrity is a faithful guide and will never lead us astray. As followers of Jesus, we must walk in the same integrity in which He walked. That is the path of truth.

When it comes to the truth, I would much rather know sooner than be surprised later. Wouldn't you? I would much rather get the full story now so that the truth of the matter can be dealt with honestly and openly. Some people wait and delay the truth - to tell the truth at a more "convenient time." But delayed truth is not truth at all. It's dishonesty and God is never pleased with dishonesty.

Yes, the truth can be painful at times and we don't like to hear it ESPECIALLY if we are the ones in the wrong. But if it is indeed the truth, let's just be honest about it.

Today

For the past six years, I have been privileged to pastor this church called Capstone. In fact, Capstone began exactly six years ago tomorrow - Monday, May 5. It's hard to believe it has been six years. We've seen God do some amazing things in these six years. We've seen many people saved and lives dramatically changed by the power of Jesus Christ. As I looked out at the audience today, I thought of the many roads we have walked together. So many of the people sitting in those chairs would not be in church today had God not planted Capstone in Anderson. I praise Him for that and we give Him all the glory.

Personally, I have grown in huge ways. God has stretched me beyond anything I could have imagined when we began. I have made many mistakes along the way. With the Lord's help, I believe I've made some good decisions as well. The greatest time of stretching came as I made the really hard decisions --- those that required standing on the Truth rather than giving in to what people wanted, what made everyone happy or kept them comfortable. I've been criticized and some have wanted to skewer and barbecue me --- I'm sure of that. I've shed tears over the heartache that comes with pastoring. But through it all, my heart has been to honor God with my life and lead His church in the way He directs me. At the end of the day, that is all that matters: leading in the way God leads.

Even though I have the amazingly wonderful and humbling responsibility of being "pastor," I am also a member of the flock. Today was evidence of that as I shared my "burdens" with my fellow church members. It was so amazing to be able to safely stand before you and tell you about my family's trials and ask you to pray KNOWING that you will do that. It was amazing to see the church BE the church that we knew God wanted us to be from day one: a church that loves God and loves people above all else. My family and I got to be the recipient of that love today (as we have many times before) and I thank you for loving, supporting, and standing in the gap for us. Please keep praying.

The amazing thing about this life is that we do not know or understand so many of the turns that the road takes. The ride can be dangerous and difficult. It can even be down-right scary at times. But because of our loving Heavenly Father, we can know with confidence that there is a plan that is greater than anything we can ever ask or imagine.

My hope, confidence and faith is placed today in the One who made me, who loves me, who has never failed me, and who never makes mistakes. Even though I cannot see where this road leads, I know who walks with me and who awaits me when I get to the end. And even when it all looks bleak and there is no hope, YET I WILL REJOICE.

"Though the fig tree does not bud
and there are no grapes on the vines,
though the olive crop fails
and the fields produce no food,
though there are no sheep in the pen
and no cattle in the stalls,
yet I will rejoice in the LORD,
I will be joyful in God my Savior."

Habbakuk 3:17-18 (NIV)

Thank you for continuing to pray for my wife and me, for holding up my arms (Exodus 17), and for carrying our burdens. I love and appreciate you more than you know.

True worshipers

Sorry I haven't posted over the past week. Things have been a little crazier than normal. The Lord clearly told me about ten days ago to ". . . let your words be few." (Ecclesiastes 5:2) That's hard to do but I have tried --- even on the blog.

The past month at Capstone has been really, really great. God is at work within the church. The Spirit of openness, brokenness and worship within the body has been very real. There are many people truly seeking a life-changing relationship with Jesus - not just going to church. Not just playing church. Not just doing church. We've never been the church "just to attend" because it's Sunday. God has consistently called us to follow His example of selflessness and servanthood. It's challenging and takes a lot of sacrifice. But according to His Word, that's what we are called to do.

Everyone doesn't agree. We live in a consumer-driven culture and people bring that attitude into church. "The church should meet my needs" is the attitude of so many. People walk into churches every Sunday, sit on a pew or in a chair, and wait on "the church" to satisfy some spiritual need they have. And if "the church" does not consistently meet their felt needs, then they will leave and search for one that does.

I don't recall Jesus ever saying, "Go into my church and get your needs met." He never said it was about us in the first place! The work of "the church" (Christ-followers) is to love and serve those around us and in order to do that we will have to put ourselves aside for someone else. I love coming together for "worship with the family" on Sundays but that is just a small part of what the church is.

Yesterday, we could not get the audio to work for the videos we were using during the service. And for about 15 minutes, that frustrated me. Our worship leader Bekky was frustrated. Our sound folks were frustrated. And after my critical thoughts of "why can't we get this right?", the Lord reminded me that our purpose there had nothing to do with a video. We were there to worship Him and that was possible without videos, cables, sound boards, etc. All we needed to have were humble hearts before Him and we would be able to worship. And we did and it was an amazing time together!

We can be so easily distracted by "our needs" that we totally lose sight of what we're supposed to be doing in the first place. John 4:23 says, "Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks."

That's who I am supposed to be - a true worshiper. That's what you are supposed to be. And that's God's greatest desire for Capstone --- that we be true worshipers who worship the Father in spirit and truth.

There's nothing in that verse about me. That's the way God wants it to be.

Rockin' Chair

Here's my girl at the Clemson Botanical Gardens on Sunday in her rockin' chair. Get it?

Monday Morning

Good morning! Here's a quick update on some things going on:

• Sunday at Capstone was great! We had a really big crowd and the response to the "Spring Training" series has been really good.
• We also had a great day of giving --- which is always needed as the work of the church continues. Praise God for providing!
• I loved seeing so many little kids running around. It seems that our preschool area is growing rapidly and it's fun to see moms and dads chasing their kids around the lobby after church.
• It was great having someone from Cliff's church at Capstone Sunday. She now lives in Anderson and he encouraged her to come our way. Thanks, Cliff!
• What a beautiful day Sunday was! Claire and I went up to the Botanical Gardens in Clemson in the afternoon and walked and enjoyed the day. She almost got attacked by a goose who was sitting on her nest. It was hilarious watching Claire run as the goose squawked!
• Dairy Queen's Georgia Mud Fudge Blast is amazing.
• We went to the cookout under the bridge on Saturday. It was fun hanging out with some of the folks I've gotten to know who eat at the Soup Kitchen. Some of the guys were surprised when they found out that I am "the preacher." Skeet told me I looked like a "street person, like one of them." That was one of the greatest compliments I've gotten in a long time!
• Went bowling Saturday afternoon and I beat Nick in the second game! He's a "young pro" and it was pretty cool to win a game. I have to admit --- he was way off of his average so I got lucky!
  
• Stay focused on the Spring Training, Capstoners! Remember this week's challenge: Speak words that are pleasing to God.
  
• Lord, what do you have for me today?
• I hope you have a great Monday. Leave me a comment and let me know what's going on with you!
  

Psalm 55

Just a quick Friday morning post before I get busy finishing up for Sunday.

If you've read this blog for very long, you have probably figured out by now that I have been in the middle of some trying days for quite a while. And even though I have not written about the specifics of the trials, I've wanted to be open with you about the fact that they are going on. I have appreciated more than you could ever know the comments and the prayers that so many of you have left and emailed me with. Some of you I don't even know and you have prayed for me. Thank you.

Because God is God and He is still doing His job, He has spoken to me through His Word on many occasions. There have been days that I have literally read a chapter or passage and felt as if I were reading the story of my life at this moment and time. That's how alive and amazing God's Word is.

Psalm 55 has been that for me this week. On Monday, God showed it to me. Since then, He has prodded me to read it over and over again --- sometimes even in the middle of the night. Every word of this chapter DOES NOT apply to my trials --- so if you read it, don't think I'm wishing death to my enemies. :) But I am praying death to this attack that has been going on for so long now. It is time for God's victory and the enemy's defeat.

So, if you find yourself in the middle of a trial and don't know the answers, pick up God's Word. I guarantee that you will find your story in there as well.

"But as for me, I will trust in you." Psalm 55:23 (NIV)

Pumping out the tank

My friend Cliff Marshall, pastor at Freedom Fellowship in Greer, has a GREAT POST on his blog today. I'm talking GREAT. Take a few moments and read it. You won't be sorry.

Promises

"Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.
They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.
I say to myself, 'The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.'
The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him;
It is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord."
Lamentations 3:22-26 (NIV)

Please pray.

Prayers are needed in a huge way. Please pray for me, my wife, and our daughter. Pray that we will have wisdom that is far beyond our human understanding. Pray that the enemy will be kept away from my family. Pray that we will not shrink away from the battle. Pray that we will live, move, and have our being in Him, that our minds will be the mind of Christ, and that we will be pure in heart. Pray that the darkness will be dispelled by His glorious light. Pray that each of us will seek only Him, dying to self, and living as Christ would have us to live.

Thank you for caring and for praying.

"Do you not know? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.

He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength.

They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."

Isaiah 40:28-31

Claire's Blog

My daughter, Claire, has a great post on her blog. God gave her something really special last night and she writes about it here. Check it out and let her (and me) know what you think.

Sunday Thoughts

God is amazing! Today was one of those great days to belong to Him, be a part of His church, and worship with some amazing people.

I was really pumped about today's service when I got up this morning. When I got to AmStar, I could tell some of our set-up folks were a little frazzled. It seems that the guy whose week it was to bring the sound trailer overslept! I don't think that's ever happened in almost six years of being a portable church.

So the music folks were a little stressed over all the rushing. But guess what??? They got it done and got it done with excellence (and time to spare!). I continue to be amazed at how God has provided so many people through the years who don't mind coming early and staying late to set-up for service. We are blessed to have them so THANKS TO ALL OF YOU!

We sang one of my favorite songs today called "Wonderful Maker" by Chris Tomlin. I was really moved by the words and the spirit of worship, as well as all that Michael put into leading us as he sang. He sang with passion and it ministered to me. Someone commented on me wiping the sweat off my face as I began to preach (it was hot in the theater) but I was actually wiping tears away.

The words of that song say, "What a wonderful Maker, what a wonderful Savior, how majestic Your whispers, how humble Your love. With a strength like no other, and the heart of a Father, how majestic Your whispers, what a wonderful God." With a strength like no other --- I have needed that strength these last few months and He has given it to me. He is our Wonderful Maker.

I was fired up preaching as well. We began "Spring Training" by talking about how we must condition ourselves spiritually in order to be in good shape for life, struggles, etc. We began today talking about conditioning our minds. The enemy knows that my greatest struggles are within my mind and he knows what buttons to push to make me think in some crazy ways. The Bible tells us this TRUTH: "We have the mind of Christ." (1 Cor 2:16). That means that I have the mind of Christ! You do as well if you are a Christ-follower. That is pretty amazing to think about! I challenged the church to meditate on that truth this week. It's awesome.

Our spiritual exercise this week is this CHALLENGE: "I will surrender my thoughts to Christ. " The Bible tells us how to do this: ". . . we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ." (2 Cor 10:5) We have the power (because the mind of Christ is in us) to take captive every evil thought and replace it with the mind of Christ. I am going to work hard to condition my mind so that I fix my eyes on Jesus, set my mind on things above, and be transformed by the renewing of my mind.

So, after lunch with mom, dad, sis, Josh, Von & Claire, and some time looking at Cuba pictures with mom, it's been a good day. God is good. I have the mind of Christ. I'm looking forward to a good day tomorrow!

PS - Johnny Depp as Willy Wonka??? Scary. Real scary. Gene Wilder will always be Willy Wonka.